T Might be for Tired - and That’s OK!
Holy Tuesday is not a day I have historically spent a lot of time on if I am honest. We move past the excitement of Palm Sunday, hearing the cries of “Hosanna, Hosanna” as the palms are laid down for Jesus to walk over. Then it has been pretty silent for me until Maundy Thursday (in recent years) - and definitely Good Friday, preparation Saturday (which let me be honest was preparation for the Sunday morning fits), and of course, Resurrection Sunday. Pausing this year to think about Holy Tuesday made me wonder, what else have I been missing from the story? Where have I glossed over that might ask me to engage the full process of that week Jesus walked and did not rush to the product of resurrection?
In Crystal Bowman and Teri McKinley’s book R is for Risen, they walk their readers through Jesus’ journey from A - Arrived - Jesus’ arrival in Jerusalem, all the way through Y- You are a part of the story, and Z- which represents A and Z - reminding us that Jesus is the beginning and the end. This book reminds us that there’s so much more than the highlight reels that we talk about often and how important it is for us to pause and take in the fullness of Jesus’ life as much as we can. The book asks us to stop, in moments we always do and in ones we might have forgotten, to remember the nuances of Jesus' journey from Sunday to Sunday.
One of those stops throughout the week is Holy Tuesday, also called Fig Tuesday. On this day we tell the story of Jesus and his disciples walking and Jesus is hungry. The writer says he sees the tree, wanting fruit and when Jesus doesn’t see fruit, he “curses” the fig tree and it withers up to never produce again. I have often heard discussions about Jesus “cursing the fig tree” but on this road to resurrection, I wonder if there’s another perspective we can consider alongside the unfolding week that we see in R is for Risen.
Maybe Jesus, even in his hunger, saw the fig tree trying to produce beyond its capacity. Maybe Jesus trusted the process of its life, having known all the layers of his own journey, and gave the tree permission to let go. Jesus may have gifted the fig tree space to stop trying to produce from lack and to let itself release. Death is scary when you don’t know the whole story. I understand why the disciples watching Jesus thought he had cursed the tree. We don’t always process death well, or letting go as a gift. We often see the failure to produce as a curse.
When the fig tree withers, it doesn’t just live broken and without fruit. Its branches begin to decompose and become a part of the earth. Its roots support living things around it until it decides to grow once again. The fig tree is far more than fruit - it is a whole, living thing which means even its ashes can support the possibilities of new life. For as the book and our story tell us, there can be a resurrection. There can be life even after death.
Jesus was tired and I think while others see him cursing the fig tree, Jesus had empathy for its condition. The book says T is for Tomb, but I also think T could be for Tired. Jesus had moved through so much and seeing the fig tree through the lenses of his own bodily hunger, he recognized its exhaustion and gave it permission to release so that it too might experience the possibilities of resurrection.
I wonder if there are times when we have been cursed or cast aside because we are not producing what is legible to those around us for extraction. People enter our lives at particular times and may perceive a season of lack - when really they are coming in a season of rejuvenation. Maybe the voice isn’t even others, but our own voice, berating ourselves for not being able to do all things, produce all things, and give on command. Sometimes when we are immersed in capitalism we mistake that for a call, as if God is calling us to shell out things in and out of season. The environment around us right now is heavy. For many of us, we have been working and pushing and producing. It is not anti-God, anti-justice, or anti-freedom to consider when it is your season to be pruned, to rejuvenate, to rest, and to consider what might be birthed from your surrender to the necessary processes of life.
Holy Tuesday reminds me to look again - to take the cue from R- is Risen - and allow for whole and robust stories to be told. To be curious that what looks like lack might be the ability and possibility to begin again. To wonder, if maybe, Jesus was giving the fig tree a place to pause and release. T being for Tired doesn’t take away R being for Risen and V being for Victory. It simply is honest about the process of life.
As we walk this journey to Resurrection Sunday, may we be kind to ourselves in this season of process over production, and trust that even in our rest, perhaps especially in it, we are still incredibly valuable.
Rev. Dr. Chelsea Brooke Yarborough
Rev. Dr. Chelsea Brooke Yarborough is the Associate Director of Leadership Programming at the Association of Theological Schools. She is an alumnus of Elon University (B.A.), Wake Forest University (MDiv) and Vanderbilt University (PhD). Her research reimagines preaching and worship by exploring the methodologies that emerge from the rhetorical and ritual practices of Black women throughout history. Dr. Yarborough’s work seeks to challenge normative power structures and traditional paradigms of proclamation, advocating for diverse platforms beyond the pulpit to amplify the voices of those that have not always been heard. At her core, she is dedicated to empowering individuals—regardless of their platform—to find, embrace, and use their voices to foster well-being, equity and the possibilities of flourishing. Dr. Yarborough is also a leadership coach, an Enneagram teacher, and a poet. Above all, she values her roles as a partner, daughter, friend, sister, and auntie.